Although the United
States we are in the new millennium has overcome many social barriers, there is
still prejudice and sexism in society today. Sexual harassment in the
workplace, although being cracked down on by law, managerial and business
codes, it is still prominent and makes it very hard for a woman to be
successful in the workplace. Stereotypes, biases, and prejudices consistently
get in the way for women, and as a result, women have had to come up with
various strategies to get ahead in modern society. One way is to marry above
one’s own social class for financial gain and class mobility.
There
have been numerous examples in popular culture of women using men as a
springboard for their own success, whether it is intentional or unintentional.
Take the Grimm fairy tale Cinderella for example. Most everyone knows the story
of the poor ‘Cinder’ girl whose cruel and abusive stepmother refuses to let the
girl go to a festival being hosted by the local prince, for fear she will marry
him, and instead endorses her own two daughters in wedding the prince. In fact,
one of the stepdaughters is willing to do anything to fit the shoe Cinderella
wore and become wealthy, even when “her mother gave her a knife and said,
‘Cut the toe off; when thou art Queen thou wilt have no more need to go on
foot’” (Grimm). The level of desperation, although somewhat exaggerated, shows the
steps women are willing to take to advance themselves socially, including
cutting off one’s toes. Every eligible woman who attended that ball, and tried
on that shoe was there to advance themselves from simple peasants to royalty.
None of these women knew, or had even met the prince, but were willing to try
and impress him for a hand in marriage. Therefore, acquiring a man’s wealth and
property through marriage is an acceptable and successful way to improve one’s
current standard of living and social class. This message is portrayed to young
girls who either read an adaptation in a children’s book, see it re-enacted in
a cartoon or movie, or from being told the story directly. Women are raised to
think in this mind-set, so naturally women are bound to act on it.
Children
are not the only ones who are fed this ‘get-rich-quick’ scheme. Adult women
reading romance novels are getting the same ideas, though perhaps not as
subtly. Jeanne Dubino, an English professor at Plymouth State College, writes
about the effects of different romance novels on many types of women, and at
the core of all of these novels is the same idea. She writes, “All varieties of
the romance contain the pattern of ‘heroine gets rich through love’” (103). In
general, women are surrounded by this idea from the moment they learn to read
up until they read to escape their own realities, affecting the way they see
relationships and marriage as a whole.
Of
course most people want to fall in love and marry a spouse that they feel
attracted to and can look to as an equal partner for the rest of their
lives…but wouldn’t it be grand to find that person, and they just so happen to
have the financial security to take care of you for the rest of your lives? In
the hit single, “Ain’t Nothin’ Goin’ On But the Rent” by Gwen Guthrie, she
proclaims that there is “no romance without finance”. This suggests that if all
you’ve got is love, then that isn’t going to be enough to keep the two of you
together. Love doesn’t pay the rent or buy groceries, and there has to be some
sort of financial income. Love is not all you need.
But what if you don’t seek to marry
that person? Dating can be just as successful with one’s own advancement in
modern-day society. A couple of lunch dates and intimate get-togethers with
one’s boss can either boost your career by receiving unfair benefits and
advantages over fellow co-workers in exchange for your company, or it can ruin
your reputation in the workplace and ruin your career. For example, say a
female secretary works for a male CEO of a large corporation. If this
hypothetical secretary were to be sexually involved with her boss, and was
given bonuses based solely upon their personal interactions, and somehow this
information was spread to the secretary’s fellow co-workers, this would prove
to be a poor choice. Rumors carry easily and if this woman’s unprofessionalism
spreads to other companies, then if for some reason her boss lets her go or
lays her off, it would be difficult to find another job.
Ruining one’s career and reputation
are a trade-off and gambling piece. Although marrying into wealth or dating to
get to the top seem like easy and fool-proof methods to success, there are
several negative consequences; the first being that there is the issue of
morals and values. If a woman feels it is necessary to pursue a man she does
not love purely for financial gain, one must wonder about the conscience and
overall happiness of that woman. To be willing to sacrifice the option of a
mutually loving and caring marriage for financial security, there are definite
psychological effects, not to mention the effects of their children (if any).
Children pick up on the moods and emotions of the parents towards each other,
and children raised in a hostile environment are more likely to have social and
psychological problems later in life (Buehler, Krishnakumar, &
Anthony 1994). Although the negative aftermath of such choices are clearly
evident, if money and social standing are what is important to oneself, then
these options can (somewhat) guarantee a financially successful life.
So
whether it be a marriage into a wealthy family, or a rendezvous with a CEO, it
is pretty clear that dating and marrying above one’s own
social standing is a good way to get a woman in 2012 where she wants to be.
Skip past the sexual harassment of the workplace, fast forward through the
expensive and stressful years of college, and go for the gold. Dig if you must,
as long as you get what you want.
Works
Cited
Buehler,
Cheryl, Ambika Krishnakumar, and Christine Anthony. "Hostile Interparental
Conflict And Youth Maladjustment." Family Relations 43.(1994):
409-416. Education Full Text (H.W. Wilson). Web. 4 Nov. 2012.
Dubino,
Jeanne. "The Cinderella Complex: Romance Fiction, Patriarchy and
Capitalism." Journal of Popular Culture 27.3 (1993): 103-118. Academic
Search Premier. Web. 28 Oct. 2012.
Guthrie,
Gwen. "Ain't Nothin' Goin' On But the Rent." Rec. 1985. Ain't
Nothin' Goin' On But the Rent. Vinyl recording. 1986.
Grimm,
The Bros. “Cinderella”. NationalGeographic.com.
National Geographic Society. 1999. Web. 28 October 2012.
